TERROR!!!!


I am having an AWESOME time in my life right now. It’s pretty fucking chaotic but, just awesome! I’m in the process of starting 3 businesses all on a shoestring because it’s that or hang myself with it. I’m going so deep within myself emotionally, mentally, spiritually, physically (I plan to master the Pull Up by the end of this year) to repair foundations that were never properly laid to begin with. I am feeling so expansive and just RIVETED by life and its infinite possibilities BUT  .     .     .

.     .     . I am also TERRIFIED.

Here is a list of the things that currently terrify me most

  • Failing – for obvious reasons
  • Succeeding – b/c it was crazy enough to work!
  • Positive Recognition – (IDK why, but I’ll figure it out)
  • Flying – haven’t been in airport in 10+ years and I don’t like to be touched randomly and have my things violated
  • Being Solo for almost 2 weeks – pretty amazing though really; NO Toddler, NO Tween, NO Hubs LIVE THE LIFE whoaaaaaoaaoaa
  • Finding myself
  • Losing myself
  • Finding that place I’ll always yearn to return to
  • Feeling out of place
  • Feeling disconnected
  • Feeling not good enough
  • Feeling exposed
  • A Yoga handstand – I’m afraid my wrist is going to snap
  • People not taking me seriously
  • Weeding out the sycophants
  • Being in Charge (like Charles)
  • Being Happy
  • Being FREE
  • Never wanting to leave the Ocean
  • Never figuring out my camera settings
  • Never showing YOU how much I LOVE
  • Never selling a single thing made by my own hands
  • My vertical garden dying while I’m away
  • Not reminding myself that the “opinions of the sheep” don’t matter
  • The fact that I have yet to accomplish ONE SINGLE FUCKING PULL UP!

Soooooo, That’s what I’m going through right now. You?

 

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